A Practical Guide to Self-Improvement
“I want to be the best version of myself.” Does that sound like you? Self-improvement unlocks the path to greater wellbeing, achievement, and interpersonal relationships. It is a gradual process that involves directed efforts to evolve into what we aspire to be. The elemental step in the self-improvement journey is to ‘understand thyself’ or tune into one’s feelings, thoughts, and consequent actions. Simply becoming aware of and accepting one’s feelings and thoughts can act as a buffer against becoming their victim. This self-awareness also helps identify the areas where one wants to grow.
Slowly and steadily train your mind to appraise situations in a ‘tall and wide’ framework. Look for the external factors that might be influencing another’s behavior rather than attributing them to unchangeable characteristics of the person. If your colleague could not complete a report in time, probably he is going through a really rough phase in his life- the ill health of a loved one, for instance. It does not necessarily mean that he was avoiding the task! Look out for how tough situations are contributing to your strengths and be grateful for the small yet precious things in your life- family, a roof over your head, access to education, nourishing food and so on. Pick the strategy that best applies to your situation- attribution, seeds of personal growth or gratitude.
Build your resources for potential obstacles in your self-improvement journey, as things don’t always go as planned! List out some positive coping strategies such as dancing away to your favorite song, journaling, prayer, or yoga. Think of alternative ways in which you can attain your goal so that you can fall back on them if one fails. It is always better to break your larger goal into easier tasks. For instance, if you want to come out of your shell and become more social, you could start by greeting known people you meet in the lifts and corridors of your residence and workplace. Later, you could join a club or hobby class and loosen up.
Develop powerful habits- which is a two-step process. Eliminate a bad habit (such as nail biting or procrastinating) and inculcate positive habits such as rising early, exercising, and reading books. Quitting a bad habit is often challenging because it signals a ‘threat’ to our brain. Having a personally relevant reason for change, setting smaller goals, and allowing the initially intense urge to dissipate (a process that takes approximately 20 minutes) can prove to be extremely beneficial in quitting a bad habit.
Lastly, get out of your comfort zone. The key idea here is to overcome your fears- be it the fear of public speaking, the fear of risk-taking or something else. Fake it till you make it, that is, take the initial leap. Once you do it, you learn that you CAN do it. Re-frame comfort to imply a sphere of meaning and learning rather than certainty and that ‘nice’ feeling that comes in the way of taking the leap. Begin by taking small steps and experience your beautiful journey of self-improvement.
Author- Ria Singh, Bachelor of Psychology Student @ UWA